March // The Faux Glamour Around Turning 18

So last week Sunday I turned 18. I could tell you how different it feels and how I am now a "grown woman and can do whatever I want" but I'd be lying and I respect your level of tolerance for played out clichés way too much to feed you that one my dear friends!

Truthfully, all I feel is a sense of uncertainty . I feel more child-like than I did at 23:57 on Saturday evening. A rush of rebellion came over me, as if urging me to live a little more, love a little harder and really not give a damn. All whilst using my non existent kick boxing skills to kick down the boundaries society sets up sky high for us females (something I stay and will forever stay preaching) .

I've struggled with my image and identity for almost seven years now. I went from "too fat" to "too skinny" all the way back to an in between,awkward size that was neither bad nor good/sexy enough - all according to society and it's rule book that we follow so religiously! And I realised how exasperating it is trying to box yourself up into a category that doesn't even account for half of your personality . All these years I have spent trying to figure out exactly where I belong. Well you know what? Home is where the heart is and my heart is in whatever touches my soul. So tonight I'll sleep with my turban on because I'm deep within my spiritual feels (yes, turbans are spiritual to me), tomorrow weave my hair,  the next  day I'll squeeze into a vest with a V-line plunging so low that my double D's make you uncomfortable! Simply because being 18 and going with the motions and wherever your heart leads you too (also taking into consideration the amount of Fendi's* you give on that day) is so much more easier and flippen peaceful for the soul!

So 18 year old me says to you .. " whatever is good for the soul, do that!"


This was my before 18 look//

Outfit

Skort playsuit - Cotton On 

Platforms - Cotton On 

Stay blessed x 

Reflections

Hi it's Luthando

I'm not really sure how to start this blog post in a way that'll entice you to keep scrolling down and reading but I'll try the cliché  "life and it's relatable shenanigans has me down" route. In usual 17-year old cases, I'd be expected to look to those quote pictures for emancipation but alas they cure not the growing pains (which is what I've ignorantly diagnosed myself with).

I have been feeling jaded as of late. It's disgusting, almost as revolting as being dependant on anything/anyone besides yourself. I don't like routine. I really dislike it and ironically at this stage, my entire life is based on routine. I am a creative. But my creativity is confined and restricted by expectations placed on me and clouded by disappointments I'm always having to "get over" .

Anyway the just of this is to just sit back and reflect on what's preventing you from BEING GREAT.  EMANCIPATE YOURSELF FROM MENTAL SLAVERY as Bob Marly once sung.

Bless.

P.s I apologise for the long absence, school is hectic.